Stolen from UnAxcess
Jun. 8th, 2006 11:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
paradoxrealm10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see one without a stiffy, make him a sandwich.
7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
6
- Some people are like a slinky... Not really good for anything, yet
you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
5 - Health freaks are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you 50 quid and a substantial tax cut saves you 50p?
2 - In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND
THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: We know exactly where any untaxed car is
located among the millions of cars in Britain......But we haven't got a
clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are
located. Maybe we should put the DVLA in charge of immigration.......
ION: I have an interview on Wednesday for a Payroll job.
Good news: It the exact same job.
Bad news: The trust that nationwide rep for being the worst payroll dept ever.
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no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 10:35 pm (UTC)MY sides hurt I've not laughed so hard in ages :D
no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 10:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 11:40 pm (UTC)I disagree with (5) though! I'm a health freak (with added booze, obviously) and I fully intend to live forever, and come visiting the rest of you fuckers on your deathbeds, where I can smile smugly in an "I told you so" kind of way.
no subject
Date: 2006-06-13 11:58 am (UTC)Just thought i'd take this oportunity to say hi, and see how things were going woth you
Are you still in manchester?, what are you up tp these days?
This is Gareth right?...
no subject
Date: 2006-06-20 01:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-20 03:24 am (UTC)Sorry, has been annoyingly bad of late and things aren't going my way.
Resorting to magic for a change.
no subject
Date: 2006-06-21 07:34 pm (UTC)And
Merry solstice!